The weirdness of this little corner of the mighty web isn’t 10 years old, it was begun as a bit of weekly silliness 2 1/2 years ago. I have no idea how many people actually read it but at least the time I spend slamming the computer is time I’m not spending in bars. The blog HAS, however, had more than a decade’s worth of spam. At least. At the time of this writing our “spam catcher” has spanked over two THOUSAND potential musubi creations. Scumbags sure seem to have plenty of spare time.

Much (most) of it is just true spam, links to crap that nobody wants, some naughty bits, lots of offers to sell prescription drugs without a prescription or a doctor or even an illness. There are, however, little nuggets of joy that pop up from time to time that I collect. Here’s the latest in the greatest hits. And remember, this CAN’T be done without a real person registering on the site manually and entering it manually. All of them have links (or broken links because they got nuked by their provider) that have nothing to do with what they wrote in the comment section. Believe me, there’s a LOT more. These just made me laugh.

• “Windward has been a godsend that has saved us about 100?200 hours at $100 per hour of work and given us a big competitive advantage over our rivals. It s been a great product.”

(Translation: time for the Blogmeister to get a raise.)

• “Aw, this was a really nice post. Taking the time and actual effort to generate a very good article… but what can I say… I hesitate a whole lot and don’t seem to get anything done.”

(My first thought was that this guy must be looking over my shoulder looking at how I get things done.)

• “Hello, just wanted to say, I enjoyed this article.It was funny. Keep on posting!Spam website”

(“Spam website” was IN the message and was also the registered username. Nope, I didn’t make that up!)

• “Thanks for sharing your thoughts about degenerates.”

(Must be referring to the comments about tenors.)

• “Great web site. Plenty of helpful info here. I am sending it to several pals ans also sharing in delicious. And naturally, thanks in your sweat!”

(Finally someone who appreciates who hard I work, kinda like keyboard aerobics. Toss me a towel, please.)

• “Hi, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam comments? If so how do you reduce it, any plugin or anything you can recommend? I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any support is very much appreciated.”

(With a spam site advertising fake wiper blades. At least it’s driving him crazy anyway.)

• “I’ve learn a few good stuff here. Definitely price bookmarking for revisiting.”

(Uhhh…what?)

• “I don’t even know the way I ended up rioght here, however I thought this post uszed to bee good. I don’t understand who you might be but definitely you are going to a famous blogger if you are not already.
  Cheers!”

(Uhhh…thanks?)

• “I Ƅelieve whаt you posted made a great deal of sense. However, think on this, suppose yߋu composed a catchier рoѕt titⅼe? I ain’t sɑying yoᥙr information isn’t good, however suppose you addеd a title to maybe grab folk’s attention? I mean Joy of Music… And All That Jazz! – The Windward Choral Society is a little plain. You might glance at Yahoo’s home page and watch how they write news titles to grab peoplе to open the links. You might add а video or a picture or two to grab readers interested about everything’ve gοt to ѕay.
  In my opinion, it would make your blog a littⅼe lіvelier.”

(Yeah? Bite me. The spam link you added was broken…who’s lively now?)

• “Many have problems with the armpits. There are a lot of bacteria. Then formed balls. They can be painful, but not always. It is better to know in advance about this problem. Then there will be no fear of horror. Good, that now I understand this.”

(Be honest, how many times have you seen the word “armpit” on line”? Yeah, that’s what I thought.)

• “The amount of written content has been growing exponentially recently, and it’s no wonder. For students, writing is an inseparable part of college and university assignments; for businesses, online publishing is a way to reach customers. The need for”

(And there it stopped. Wow.)

• “Hey guys,check out my profile. I got so much beard after using Adam’s Herbal medicine I got from him in two days. I got in touch with him after seeing some results of his works. I have used it for two weeks and three days now and my beard is almost full. I have used so many other remedies,but doesn’t work and i lost so much money. Adam’s medicine doesn’t cost much and the shipping is free. I promised him I’ll talk about him how ever I can as a little appreciation. I’m loving myself right now”

(So…he wants to be a wookie? The REALLY funny thing is that the link with the spam was for a hacks-for-video-games site. Not a single hair in the place.)

• “For anybody who believed that twerking had its moment and now it really is gone, that is clearly not the case.”

(I..uh…um…I got nothin’. That’s just too far out in left field even for me. That’s probably partly due to the fact that I don’t twerk. I’d immediately need opioids and physical therapy.)

New leader in the clubhouse for weirdest spam message in our comment section and it’s not even close. From the Ukraine with no actual web site:

• “For now, the two thousand pairs of large-flied silk boxer shorts remain in a warehouse in Florida, but Stafford Smith has talked to the donor about commissioning a new shipment.”

(Large-flied boxer shorts? It’s gonna take a while to get the picture out of my head. And yes, there are about twenty crude comments that immediately blossomed in my brain and no, I’m not sharing a single one. My mother might read this.)